Heidelberg

Sitting in a Macdonalds in Heidelberg (for the wifi) while waiting for the bus.
I find myself trying to make conversations with locals, so easily too, asking questions here and there, smiling. Are you a tourist? Are you a student? Where are you from? What is it like? Is that your pet? I want to know, I want to know more

I feel like this immense zest in me will fizz out soon, as with my initial amazement with snow, with European buildings, with France, with castles and so forth. The intense uncontainable surge of joy that rushes through my blood and spills through my lips will soon be dried up by my numbed, gradually-apathetic brain. These short-lived moments of excitement and exhilaration. 
I hope not, though, and I hope for more exciting days to come 🙂 Meanwhile, I’m basking in these moments the best ways I can.

 The sun had barely risen and I was awake (jolted awake an earlier before my alarm – i am a kanchiong spider) 

My daily dose of icecream. It’s been a week, it’s an unhealthy part of my daily diet. But it makes me happy 🙂

You know, for now, I’m really thankful and happy to be here. I can’t help but think that I deserve this, I deserve this because I’ve worked so hard for it, and the timing cannot be better. I’ve been waiting for so long for this, and right now I just want to bask in every moment and stay happy all the time because I should be, because I want to be and because I think I deserve to be. Such a snobbish statement, but when I try to suppress / retract this line it peeks out from my lips again – I really think I deserve this. Which means I sincerely, from-the-bottom-of-my-heart think I deserve this. And you know what, I should stop trying to question / undermine that and EMBRACE it. I deserve this, I DESERVE THIS.
– inserts ‘ok, chill’
– inserts ‘but you don’t understand! whining-

to rmb:
England, Ontario couple, Freiburg student who brought guinea pigs home, map lady, Nuremberg and its rebuilt buildings / structures that were destroyed during the war

—–

Came back home, Sam was outside with the key I took, she had to wait for me to get back before returning home. I thought she’d be a little frustrated to say the least, but she was SO NICE and told me about her bad day – which was really bad 😥 – and then there we were, whispering along the corridors and listening to her love life. And then we talk and we talk, and someone walks out, so we go back to our rooms – but THAT feeling, you know that feeling? That feeling of having shared something, having a shared moment, quiet whispers along the corridors, and you step back into your room feeling floaty and happy, a moment you’ll remember. Thank you for that :’)

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